Teeth + Swimming + Me = $$$

My mom reminded me just now of my long history of my teeth & swimming.
27 or so years ago (I can't really remember), I jumped into a swimming pool, landed on a little boy's head, & knocked out my front baby tooth. The boy recovered just fine; I had a cute, toothless grin until I got my adult teeth.
15 years or so ago (again, bad memory), I knocked my tooth really hard in a water accident- I think perhaps a jet ski or a tube, on someone's head. It killed my front tooth & resulted in a root canal & a tooth that has always been a shade gray.
13ish years ago (Father's Day, in fact) in a water skiing accident, I somehow managed to wrap the ski rope around my neck & nearly decapitate myself in the boat's prop. My daddy & good friend/pediatrician, Rick Rogers, saved my life- literally- by jumping in & snagging the rope, releasing me from certain death or paralysis in the boat's prop. This didn't actually hurt my mouth at all but, I did have a lovely rope burn around my neck for a long time.
Today, in swimming lessons with Will, he was playing with a toy mirror, saying "Will" as he looked at & kissed himself - vain, I know. Anyway, he began waving it & managed to knock me in the mouth, right on my dead tooth. I grabbed my mouth with one hand & noticed part of my tooth came with my hand. We quickly exited the water, & fortunately, I felt no pain as the tooth had died in the above mentioned accident. I went to my dentist, (I accidently left the big chip at home but he said it was beyond repair anyway.) He began to inspect it & noticed not only was it very loose, but pieces of it were just flaking away. We discussed our options & cost - front teeth are not cheap, people! He was unable to do an extensive exam today as his office was actually closed (he was nice enough to meet me there) & therefore, he didn't have an assistant. Tomorrow morning, I go from 8am - 10am for x-rays to determine how much is actually broken and what our options are. There is a good chance I may be undergoing my very first surgery this week - yea! Thank goodness for dental insurance.
I called Reagan to let him know what had happened & he wondered if perhaps Will & I had a conspiracy to (a) get my mom to stay in town from Easter longer -my dad flew home yesterday), & (b) get my teeth whitened- not previously an option due to the dead tooth dead center- you can't whiten a dead tooth so it would have looked really awful.
If I do get surgery, at least I'll get whiter teeth. I can't eat solid or hard foods right now so I'm hoping this will force me into weight loss. (Of course, I'll probably just use it justify ice cream.)
I don't do math very well (or at all) but I can figure this equation out-
Teeth + Water Activities + Me = $$$!

(My jaw is throbbing so I'm going to lay down but I've got billions of pictures to post so stay tuned!)