Set for Extinction?

Recently, I read this at a blog I stumbled across, Bringing the Sunshine, written by another mother of two children with separate, unrelated medical conditions.  I've found I can often relate to her thoughts and stories and find comfort in knowing there is another mom who, despite different diagnoses, is in my world - one in which all we know of parenting is having children who are differently abled.

I was disgusted, heartbroken, and sick to my stomach as I read the post.

I followed the links and read the article the blogger, Andi, refers to.

And my heart ached.  I asked for her permission to link to the post here because I felt she did such a good job of giving  a voice to those who are often too weak to stand up for themselves.

My children could fall into the categories she describes - Ellie has bilateral club feet  - which are actually secondary to her diagnosis.  Will, in addition to limb differences, has had to have multiple mouth surgeries (not cleft pallete but mouth issues, none the less.)

We had several doctors mention abortion to us during our pregnancy with Ellie but we quite quickly informed them that her life has value - in whatever form it came and for however long it lasted.

We do not define quality of life based on a diagnosis.

We value each life - from the baby we never knew to that of each of our children.

It is heartbreaking that some in the medical community and that perhaps even scared mothers, who maybe don't have an adequate support system or don't know how to research for themselves, may feel that when presented with a diagnosis they have no other choice or are doing a "favor" to the baby.  I love Andi's comments after the post in which she mentions this - as if a diagnosis means a life of suffering (it does not.)  We hate the pity stare because we do not feel sorry for ourselves.  I love our life.
Yes, it's different & often challenging but I wouldn't do it any other way.  My children are precious and our lives are richer because of their presence.  

I called a center for choosing life for the unborn in our previous hometown and offered my name and number to their counseling center as a resource for moms facing a scary diagnosis for their unborn baby. I want to be available to answer questions, to cry with, to help research or locate doctors, to grasp insurance companies, and most importantly, to encourage - to show them that a diagnosis does not define a life - it simply becomes part of it.  I know the fear and the overwhelm and recognize that our faith and our support system enabled us to get through those initial feelings.  I would love to be able to walk beside another mom- I am confident that in choosing life her life will be blessed - she can't imagine today the blessings she will know in her future.

Just wanted to share this post with you today.

1 thoughts:

tory said...

~this was just so beautifully emotional~!!! thank you for sharing! ~many blessings to you and your family~

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